small-talk in the night

Here’s my draft for today, Monday 05.06.19.

small-talk in the night
 
you know me, I’m horrible at small-talk
so here’s what it’s like when it’s my turn, say
I want to say something to you like
I’ve always lived my life at a crossroads
plainly like that, so you see
I’m standing in the center of, you know
three possible directions
since, I’ve been told, it’s no ever turning back
right, it’s said to be impossible, right
and I’m at it, barely, my words try to be spare
kind of like a naked bulb, burning for your return
I’m peering through the window
with words jumbled trying to say, sorry
into this darkness, like I’m kind of
yearning to burn bigger, that star kind of burn
see, I’m disconcerted
but I do want to go back
I’d like to light up so you can see me
attract your flight back
your turning back too
I don’t know
so that’s what I talk like
and it’s not even that you’re here
so it’s really just me talking to myself
and I can’t even do that right, right

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