I quit watching the clock some time ago. Facts
such as my age, or what day or month or year
it is often escape me, mean little to me.
Since retirement, I’ve been learning to converse
with family who’ve gone off the clock before me.
If their language is English, we can speak regularly,
but especially for more distant ancestors,
verbal communication has been impossible.
Korean and Norwegian, I’m ashamed to say,
are languages I never learned.
But I’ve been working on a remedy, endeavoring
to develop interaction with them in another way.
With those whom language is a barrier for me,
I’ve been practicing what I’d call a “feelingness,”
an intense sense that we’re all together in spirit,
connecting in a kind of energetic interaction.
Traveling to the lands of my roots has helped me
become more attuned to them. Visits to Korea and Norway
since retirement, have fostered an intense consciousness
of my proximity to them, such that were they still flesh,
I could embrace them.
The clock I never worry about now runs down,
But I’m not worried about that at all.
When I’m turned to ashes, as planned, I’m ready
to mingle with all the relatives who’ve preceded me.
I see no barrier between this phase and next.
I believe I’ll be able to converse easily with those
who are here now or who will come after me,
should they so wish.
Lanning Lee 