Not the One

“I wish you would try to see it from my side, baby.”

See it from his side. I have absolutely zero interest in doing that. If I could see it from his side, then there’d be two of us agreeing to this scheme.

I believe in love. I believe there is someone out there for everyone. But in a world as big as ours with as many people as there are, I couldn’t believe that I’d finally found “the one.” Good looking, college-educated, an up-and-coming professional – he had everything I was looking for in a man.

He works for the largest bank in Hawai‘i. His job is to develop tailored investment portfolios for some of the bank’s wealthiest customers. In this capacity, he’s succeeded in making them wealthier by leaps and bounds.

And now he comes up with this plan. His idea, he tells me, is to make a lot more money for himself by leaving the bank and offering the same kind of wealth management to clients with his salary then tied to their success The more money he makes for them, the more he makes for himself.

“But you’ll have to develop your clientele. That’s not going to be easy.”

“I’m not worried at all about that, baby,” he says. “I’ll just take all my clients at the bank with me.”

“What? Is that even legal?”

“Why not,” he says. “I know them, they know me. Why wouldn’t they follow me? I’m making them a ton of money. If I leave the bank, there’s no guarantee that the next investment VP will do as well for them. I’ve got the Midas touch, baby. We’ll be rolling in moolah.”

“But even if it’s legal,” I tell him, “don’t you think it’s immoral? To steal customers away. That’s horrible. The bank trusts you to take care of these people. For the bank. Not for your personal benefit. They even paid for your MBA program.”

“Customers, smushtomers, baby. If I go, they’ll follow me. I’m like the pied piper leading the rats out of town. The only difference is, I’m leading them to the magic kingdom of money, money, and more money. My rats’ll live like kings.”

I can’t believe what I’m hearing. This is not the man I fell in love with. Crafty. Self-serving. Greasy. Morally bankrupt.

“Three of them have already said they’ll go with me. They’re so rich, even if none of the rest follow me I’ll be set for life. “You could be marrying the next Warren Buffet.”

Or I could be marrying the next Bernie Madoff.

“I think it’s a terrible idea,” I tell him, but he says, again, that he wishes I could see it from his side.

His side. All of a sudden there’s a huge divide. I know he can’t understand it, but I’m out of love as of right now. If I married someone so unprincipled, I’d never be able to live with myself.

“I’m sorry,” I say getting up to go. “I could never marry someone as slimy as you.

You’d think saying something like that might shock him. But all he does is smile.

“Okay, baby, but it’s your loss.”

I shudder. It’s as if a Mr. Hyde side of him has taken over completely. I’m escaping from the clutches of one of the worst human beings I’ve ever known, and well rid of him.

But I’m not giving up. “The one” I believe is still out there. And may the one at least be a decent human being.