Jacob Sugai sat glassy-eyed, his cold hands folded and resting on the deep green desk blotter. He’d been first into the office every working day of his life, just as he had been this morning, but today, once he sat down to work, he found that he couldn’t lift a finger. Not anymore. Never again, he knew. He was sick of it.
Always second, Teresa Fong came in next, passed him by, not noticing him, another fixture in the office to breeze by. Why, he wondered, did she not stop to say something, anything? Not even a hello.
Although to be fair, Jacob never said a word to anyone in the morning. But to be fairer, it was usually because he was already engrossed in his email messages by the time Teresa arrived. Well, he thought, it could be my fault. My fault for working too hard. If I’d be sipping coffee and scarfing down a donut, maybe he and she might have been more sociable, a little more friendly to each other in the end.
But she’d not even noticed that he sat there doing nothing. From his point of view, a dramatic break in his behavior for the first time in a thirty-year career.
How ironic, he thought, that him sitting doing nothing might garner the same attention from Teresa as him sitting doing something.
Jacob’s eyes flicked up to the clock on the wall. What he wanted to do was get up and leave. But his energy level, once he knew he could no longer work in this place, had dropped just like his body had dropped into his chair, the one that conformed so perfectly to the contour of his butt after thirty years. It was comfortable, very comfortable to sit here after thirty long, long years. But no more.
But never again. He preferred not to do anything ever again. There’d be no more ladder climbing. He’d gone as far as he could go a long time ago. Never mind that he wasn’t at the top of something. Today was it. Thirty years of his life given to email and filing and figuring and checking and finalizing what? It amounted, all of it, to a waste of thirty precious years of his life. What if he died? What would he be remembered for? Being a diligent fact and figure checker? How stunning a mark on the world that would make, he thought.
Jerry Vega and Steve Hammond came through the door laughing and joking. What was so funny every day for them? It never ceased to amaze Jacob that these two could find so much in life that was amusing. And their desks were next to each other, so laughter would emanate from that corner of the office all day long. It was as if they didn’t work either. Just in a different way. Today they would waste time joking, and today Jacob would sit. None of the three doing anything of any significant contribution to the company.
Neither had said good morning to Jacob. What an office, he thought. What a way to be unappreciated for thirty years.
Jacob looked up at the clock. Next in would be the section head, Claudia Ho. And she would have the box of donuts, or a tray of cookies, or SPAM musubi, or whatever else they would munch on before and after lunch. The lunch that came for all of them at noon, like a school bell ringing them from one period to the next.
I should have done better in school, Jacob thought. If I’d paid more attention instead of complaining about everything being so boring, I might have learned enough to get myself headed in a more meaningful direction in life. Talk about boring. This job was boring. Now he did have something to complain about. Which he never did. But today was different.
Because of not caring about high school, he’d trained himself not to care about college. He’d drifted through because his parents wanted him to go. The only quest for knowledge had been to find the easiest major. Why he’d thought a degree in business was easy remained a mystery to him. In retrospect, it had been fairly difficult. But he’d persevered, plowed through studying just enough to pass his classes.
Jacob looked up at the clock again, then at his folded hands. Something was wrong. He unfolded them and turned in his chair to survey his co-workers. All of them had stopped talking. Everyone was staring at him. They looked like zombies.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” asked Jacob. “What? Are you surprised that I’m sitting at my desk as always but not doing anything today?”
Just at that moment, Claudia came through the door, Leonard’s Bakery box in hand. Hot malasadas. Everyone loved those. Even me, Jacob thought.
She placed the pink box by the coffee pot and then said, without turning around, “Damn, I miss Jacob already. Usually the coffee’s made.” She leaned against the counter for a moment, shook her head.
Turning around, she said. “Anyone want to volunteer to replace Jacob as coffee maker?”
Replace me, thought Jacob, a bit astonished by this statement.
“How about we take turns,” said Teresa. I’ll post a sign-up sheet, we can choose the day we want.”
“Okay,” said Claudia, “but there are only four of us now. That’s until I hire Jacob’s replacement. One of us is going to have to make it twice a week for a while.”
“I can,” said Jerry. “That’s not a problem.”
Jacob sat stunned, unable to speak. Replace him? Miss him? What?
“Hey,” Jacob said, “I’m right here. Just because I’ve decided I can’t do any more work here doesn’t mean you can ignore me. I’m still here.”
“Have we heard when the service is?” asked Teresa.
“No, not yet,” said Claudia, “but I’ll be sure to let you folks know when something’s announced. Anyway, let me make some coffee. Man, I sure miss Jacob.”
Lanning Lee 